* By Walleria Suri
When we think about being a man and being a woman, we establish the most fundamental separation of classification of human beings. Because it is obvious and can be seen at birth – and even before. “Congratulations, Mom, this is your son.” Or, "This is your daughter." And then the parents or guardians are responsible for teaching the proper life for the girl and the proper life for the boy. And it should go this way without complications for anyone. But there is an "I" in the story. An “I” with wills, desires, instincts and elaborations of itself. Elaborations that give you the ability to recognize the genre that matches most harmoniously and more authentically represent your instincts, wishes and desires. In this way, being male or female goes beyond the physical anatomy of birth. And it also goes beyond conventional social conditioning. It is something inherent to the self-recognition of the individual.
I'm not a woman because I paint my nails, wear heels and have a vagina. I am a woman because all my existential elaborations associate me with the feminine. So it is something that is beyond the body, and not determined by it. My gender identity is defined by a feeling of meeting my vital impulses. The influence of the environment can lead to the possibilities of experiencing and manifesting my gender identity, but it is also not enough to determine it. The identification of my gender will occur through the recognition of the elements that constitute me. I recognize what I feel is legitimate about my conception of being. I recognize what I think as a legitimate elaboration of what I feel. I need to recognize my body as a legitimate means of expression of all my thoughts and feelings, in the form of wills, desires and emotions.
So, I will only be able to experience a gender identity in a healthy way when my feeling, my thinking and my expressing (body) point in the same direction. It doesn't matter what the direction is. All it takes is that these elements are in harmony to have a healthy gender identity. Because the great inner suffering of transsexual people is having to live with the constant existential inadequacy, caused by an immense feeling of discomfort within themselves.
This is why physical transformation is so necessary and important for transgender women and trans men. There are no problems with feeling and thinking. These work satisfactorily. Therefore, it is not possible to speak of a disorder, or to attribute any type of pathology, to this form of psychic construction. The body only has to adapt to the gender of self-identification. For feeling and thinking are established in an impossible way to be compulsorily modified. Even if gender roles are human cultural constructions, what establishes the identification of the individual with a certain gender, or with none at all, is an inner listening that is beyond cultural reach. It concerns the deepest human instincts that are formed in a totally free way. It can be repressed for a lifetime, but never conditioned.